Stained glass eyes

My eyes are stained.
Stained with fear.  Fear of impending changes some completely out of my control. Fear of  changes that will affect my future plans.  Fear of life progressing around me and not being able to stop it or slow it down.
 
 My eyes are stained with Pain.
 Pain as my body ages and that my mind continually cajoles and shames it into doing things it isn't made for any longer.  Pain in watching a friend lose her father and reliving the pain of losing my mother and knowing that someday too soon I will lose my father as well.

 My eyes are stained with grief.
 Grief for that same friend as she bravely makes her way through her own stained eyes.

 My eyes are stained with Rage.
Rage over the events that are out of my control and for the people who just cant seem to see the Fear, Pain and Grief in the worlds eyes.

My eyes are stained  with sadness.
Sadness of the accumulation of all of the above and the way it has Stained my view of myself and the world around me.

I have decided that our eyes will always be stained and that we will view our world and our selves through those stains.  I have decided that I will have Stained Glass Eyes and I choose to create my vision with a never ending palate of color.  I will use the Fear, Pain, Grief and Rage as contrasting color to the Love, Laughter, Joy and Freedom that I will infuse in my Stained Glass eyes.  Just as great works of art adorn Cathedral windows with hues of reds, greens, blues and yellows, I will use the darker colors to frame and shade their beauty. Some refer to this as looking through rose colored glasses.  To them I say, my eyes are stained glass eyes and I prefer the beauty of looking through these eyes over the stains of bitterness and sorrow.

Family Feud

I have 4 cats.  Each has a very distinct purrsonality.  Chloe is the Queen.  She is royalty and is not afraid to tell you about it.  She reminds me of Dame Maggie Smith, as she so elegantly says, "HONESTLY" and makes the receiver of the comment feel about 1" tall.  Tucker is the hero.  He is blind but it never gets him down and he never lets it stop him from taking that leap of faith off of the furniture. No matter how he lands, he picks himself up and moves on.  Gracie is very timid and shy and reminds me of a little girl swaying back and forth twirling her pigtails.   Then there is Roy.
Roy is ALL boy and a rough houser.  He loves to be petted but he is just as likely to swat your hand as to kiss it. 
Dad and Roy have not been the best of friends.  Dad doesn't like how Roy will jump on Gracie while playing and rough her up.  Dad always believed that Roy was the instigator, but those of us who own cats know better!  Roy never helped his position with Dad because he delights in "poking" Dad both figuratively and literally.

Dad and I will sit on the couch in the basement in the evening and eat dinner and watch TV.  Roy decided that he liked to lay on the back of the couch and nap.  This was not a problem until Roy figured out that if he bothered Dad, I would get up and feed him to make him stop.  Roy would position himself behind Dads head and smack Dad with his paw.  This pissed Dad off and he would humph and move over.  This went on for several days with Roy smacking Dad on the head and Dad getting up in a huff and either moving to another chair, tossing Roy on the floor, or Dad leaning forward on the edge of the couch so that Roy couldn't reach him.  It culminated in an episode where Roy gleefully positioned himself so that his outstretched paws were on either side of Dads head and he batted Dad back and forth like a ping pong ball.  Dad was infuriated and I was no help as I had my hand over my mouth trying not to laugh.  I completely lost it when Dad turned to me and said, "It's NOT FUNNY!  He's doing it on purpose!!!!!"  Tears rolled down my face and I gasped for breath as I convulsed in laughter.  All I could think of was those millions of kids out there screaming, "HE'S TOUCHING ME!!!"
Once I composed myself, I placed two pillows on the back of the couch so that Roy could not get behind Dad's head and armed Dad with a squirt bottle of water and instructions to "shoot" Roy if he poked at Dad.  This worked well until last night.

While sitting on the couch and enjoying TV, Roy jumped on the couch and assumed his normal position for a nap.  Neither Dad nor I thought anything about it and paid no attention to Roy.  All of a sudden, a pillow comes rolling over Dad's head and lands in his lap.  We both turned around and there was Roy in all his glory with a HUGE grin on his face, laying right behind Dad's head.  Dad and I nearly fell off the couch laughing. It was such a deliberate act and so righteously naughty that we just had to bow to the master and giggle.
Obviously, this is not going to lead to Dad adoring Roy or to letting him bop Dads head, but it did lead to a bit of a truce and Dad had to admit that Roy does have a great sense of humor.

Oh Christmas Tree!

My Name is Elaine and I'm A Christmas-aholic. 

I just love Christmas!  I don't get too wrapped up in the religious connotations of it, but I just love the season itself.  It's just after autumn which is a another favorite of mine and it brings a chance to "deck the halls" with some pretty decorations and wonderful music.  Of course there is the Christmas tree to think of too.  Real or artificial? Large or small?  Live cut or lot?   So many decisions even before you  buy the tree!  I have to admit that I have not had a tree for several years.  WHAT?  A Christmas junkie like me without a tree you ask?  Well, I did not want to have a cut tree because I don't like killing the tree and I don't like picking up the needles and I am always afraid of fire with a dying tree in the house.  So, I just decorated without a tree.  This year, thanks to one of my coworkers and her Mom, (Thanks Cody and Victoria!), I have a beautiful artificial tree in the living room.  Please let me share the setting up of said tree. 

It started by bringing it into the house.  The tree is stored and a LARGE green bag and it took Dad and I both to carry it into the house.  It must have looked like we were carrying a body in a bag, but no one called the police on us so I guess we are OK for now.  Once inside the pieces of the tree were removed and assembled with lots of "ZACH MOVE!" and "ROY GET OUT OF THERE"!   With the tree assembled and moved into its spot, the decorating began!  Dad had a cold and had not been feeling well all week so I figured he would sit in his recliner and watch.  NOPE. He helped put the whole thing together and enjoyed himself.  First came the lights, which proceeded to snarl up and tangle each time they were passed around the tree.  How can lights tangle from one side of the tree to the other?????  Once the lights were on, then it was time for the ornaments.  I had to buy all new ornaments since I had given away or sold all of my old ones.  Trying to get into the packages was a bit like cracking open a safe.  Good Grief who comes up with these things?????  After finally opening the bulbs and snowflakes, I looked for the hangers.  I KNOW I bought two packages but could only find one.  We went through the first package and then I resorted to paperclips for the remainder.   All the ornaments on the tree and then the garland.  TA DA!  A Christmas tree! Of course it was after it was all done that I found the second pack of hangers.  SIGH.

 

Then it was time to introduce the cats to the tree.  Tucker came in first and  he just sniffed and sat down.  Since he is completely blind the ornaments and lights don't attract him.

 

Then came Roy and Gracie.  Gracie was first and learned her lesson quickly.  You see, Dad and I knew that Roy and Gracie would get excited about the tree so part of our pre-planning was to have a squirt bottle filled with water set up close by so that any attempt at ornament batting would be promptly dampened!! Gracie was first up and that's why you don't see her here.  Roy was next and this was his first, and last, attempt at ornament baseball.

 



 

Chloe looked at the tree, looked at us and said, "you people are idiots", flicked her tail and walked away.  Zach just watched all the chaos and said, "whatever makes YOU happy, makes me happy"  typical Lab! :-) 



 

Once the tree was up it was time to admire it.  In my house that means we get out the camera and shoot the heck out of it!  So, besides the shots you see above, Dad got some "abstracts" that are fun too!

 



 As you can see, a Christmas tree is loads of fun.  I had forgotten just how pretty it is to have one in the house.  I am already planning for next year.  Get out of my way at the after Christmas ornament sale!   Merry Christmas to everyone and have the best New Year!

Words

I haven't posted anything for a while.  It seems I was at "a loss for words"!  That got me thinking about words and how we use them. We have so many expressions using "words".  Being a photographer, I often think, "a picture is worth a thousand words", but I also feel that so many photos are enhanced by adding a phrase or a poem to evoke the feeling that the photographer is conveying.  Then there is the sorrow that we experience with others when we, "can't find the words" and yet, somehow, just those lack of words say so much. We can be silly and just say, "WORD!" but this must be accompanied by a certain swagger and head bob along with some silly finger waving gesture! NOT THAT ONE!!!!  See, a mispoken word can change a lot of things.  Then we add in some punctuation and with a single comma change things.  I love PDQ Bach, (google it!) and one of his Christmas songs is Throw the Yule log, on Uncle John!  What a difference a comma makes! :-)
We say, "a word to the wise".  Hey, if they are so wise they should have the word already right???  And haven't we all heard our parents say, "I want a word with you."  If only it was one word! I mean couldn't they have just said, "BAD!" and been done?  Not so easy as that was it? Words are so important that we are asked to "give" them.  "Give me your word" conveys honesty and trust in that "word".  It all crumbles when someone "breaks their word" and then we lose that trust and honesty.  There is "The Word".  Those capital letters raise that phrase to a Higher Power and will not be questioned! When people proclaim to speak, "The Word of God", I would like to think that their message is an interpretation of their feelings towards that All Knowing One and that they don't really think they have the power to speak for Him. We "put out the word" when we want something to be communicated on a large scale.  We say, "words cannot express..." and yet we go on and on with words about our expression. As children we chanted, "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me"  That is so untrue, as we found out on our journey to adulthood, "the pen is mightier than the sword".  And then we have a "play on words".  Hmmmm I wonder who will have the leading role??  Oh Deer, have I said something wrong Dear?  Comedian Steve Wright wants to know "what's another word for Thesaurus?"  Then George Carlin wrote an entire act on Seven Dirty Words. What fun we can have with our words and what great things we can convey to each other through them.  I love the quote by Ludwig Wittgenstein, "Uttering a word is like striking a note on the keyboard of imagination". I hope my little word rant has given you a smile and made you stop to think about the power of your words.  The next person you talk to, choose your words carefully and with compassion because you never know when a single word can change someones entire life. 

Sick kitty/Healthy kitty

Cats can get comfortable just about anywhere. It doesn't matter if they fit into the space or not, just as long as they can curl up and not feel like they are going to fall off.  Of course, sometimes they do fall off and we laugh at them and they become indignant!  I mean, REALLY, how dare we laugh AT them? As independent as they are and as fiesty as they are, it still causes pain when they hurt.  Royhad a really bad fever at the beginning of this week.  He was fine on Sunday morning and then in the evening when I came home, he was lethargic and had diarrhea.  I waited until the following morning to see if he just had a tummy ache but he was not any better by then.  A trip to the vet found his temperature at 106!!!  That is scary high.  He ended up staying 2 nights in the hospital while he got IV fluids and antibiotics. I am happy to say that he is home and is his old self once more but it was sure scarey to see him so sick.  When Roy doesn't want to eat OR go outside, you know that something is really wrong.

I guess I have to adjust my first statement, cats don't get too comfortable at the vets office!  When I took Roy in, the staff was SO sympathetic and quickly moved into action to get Roy feeling better. (Abilene Animal Hospital you are all the best!).  The next day I stopped in after work to check on Roy and everyone was still very sympathetic and worried about Roy even though he did show signs of improvement.  The following day I walked in after I had gotten off work and the first receptionist looked at me and said, "Roy is ready to go home and telling everyone about it!"  Then another receptionist walked around the corner and said, "Oh good, you're here!  Roy wants to go home!"  I went to go sit down in the lobby and a vet tech came around the corner and looked at me and said, "Roy REALLY wants to go home!"   I was busting up laughing by this point, knowing that "my" Roy was back in full force when the Dr. came around the corner and said, "Roy is telling EVERYONE that he wants to go home!!" 

So, Roy is home and healthy and happy and isn't that all that matters? Now, if I can just convince him that antibiotics twice a day are a good thing!  Yeah, that's not happening!

How dumb are we getting?

 



A recent series of events has caused me to raise this question... Just how dumb are we making ourselves with all this new technology? Don't get me wrong, I sit here blogging on my laptop and I have a cell phone and I work on computers all day long, however, what I see is people relying on the technology to think FOR them instead of figuring things out on their own.  Case in point, most of you reading this know that I dispatch for police and fire.  One of the officers came into dispatch the other day and he was shaking his head in wonder.  I asked what was wrong and he told me the following:
He saw a car going down the road that night with no lights on and pulled the young woman driver over. He asked why she didn't have her lights on and her explaination was that this was not her car and as it was an older model vehicle it didn't turn the lights on automatically and she didn't know how to turn them on.  The officer gave her a quick lesson on how to pull the knob on the dashboard to turn the lights on and then to push the knob to turn them off.  Being a dedicated professional, he then asked if she knew how to use the high beams.  High beams? she asked? He then showed her the "MAGIC" of pulling back on the turn signal lever to turn them up and then back down.  He then handed her a ticket and wished her a nice day.  REALLY!!!!!!!!  I am not lying to you, this is an ACTUAL event, the womans age you ask?  25!!!  Add this to the wife of a higher ranking fireman somewhere in California.  She took her husbands beloved truck to the gas station and needed to fill the tank.  She looked at the gas pumps and saw the different grades of gasoline.  Not wanting to do ANYTHING to mess up the truck, she called her husband to ask .....wait for it...... "Honey, what YEAR gas do you want me to use? The older or the newer?"  For those trying to picture this, she was refering to the octane levels of 87, 89, etc listed on the pumps!

All of this has to make you laugh, but I think we should be scared too. We are not teaching our children to think for themselves and to make decisions.  Our society is SO afraid to take the initiative and to use common sense in case we offend, do it wrong, make a misteak ! OH MY!  I think we need to wake up and take a good hard look at how ridiculous things have become.  Seriously, do we really HAVE to put a notice on our sunshields that go on the cars dashboard, "Do not drive with this in place."

Technology is a great TOOL!  But it is NOT meant to be a replacement for our  brains.  We need to really take a long, hard look at where we stand right now regarding the eduation that our children are getting.  Are we teaching them life lessons, or just how to beat the system and get by?  I worry for the younger generation and our future.  In this political year how about a campaign for common sense and common courtesy and the ability to use them!

What makes you happy!

One of the quotes I have on my "Happy Door" ,(see previous post for explanation), is "Do more of what makes you happy!" I went to a concert tonight and it made me VERY happy!  I almost didn't go because I was giving myself my usual excuses of " You have to get up early in the morning." "It probably won't be any good." and so on.  The concert in question was Ronny Cox playing at Great Plains Theater in Abilene.  Yep, right here in my own town. I looked Mr Cox up on the Internet and listened to some of his music on line and really liked the home grown, folk/bluegrass thing he had going on.  I STILL tried to make up excuses, "I'll have to go on my own because everyone else is working".  Then I looked up at my Happy Door and I saw the little frog in the picture dancing and the caption saying, "Do more of what makes you happy!"  I immediately ordered my ticket.  I just got home a little while ago.  I had SO much fun!!  Mr. Cox was delightful, greeting everyone at the door with a smile and a handshake and he wanted to know every one's name.  Then the singing and playing began!  Mr. Cox likes to tell stories and with the intimate setting in the old converted Chapel, it felt like we were sitting around in someones living room with friends. The songs he played with accompaniment from his two fellow musicians, made us laugh and cry and tap toes and clap hands.  God decided to join the band with a light show sparkling off the stained glass windows and a BIG bass drum thrown in to boot.  The music never missed a beat.  I am so glad that I decided to post things on my Happy Door and I am even more glad that I listened to the advice from those quotes.  I did more of what makes me happy and good music ALWAYS makes me happy!